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Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Reaction Time
Football (soccer to Americans)
It's just before England v France at the Millennium Stadium,
an important European Championship qualifier game.
David Beckham goes into the English changing room to find all his team mates looking a bit glum.
"What's up?" he asks.
"Well, we're having trouble getting motivated for this game.
We know it's important but it's only France.
They're sh*t and we can't be bothered"
Beckham looks at them and says
"Well, I reckon I can beat these guys by myself,
you lads go down the pub."
So David Beckham goes out to play France by himself
and the rest of the England team go off for a few jars.
After a few pints they wonder how the game is going,
so they get the landlord to put the teletext on.
A big cheer goes up as the screen reads
"England 1 - France 0 (D. Beckham 10 minutes)"
He is beating France all by himself!
Anyway, a few more pints later
and the game is forgotten until someone remembers
"It must be full time now, let's see how he got on."
They put the teletext on.
"Result from the Millennium Stadium :
England 1 (Beckham 10 minutes) - France 1 (Zidane 89 minutes).
They can't believe it, he has single handedly got a draw against France!!
They rush back to the Stadium to congratulate him.
They find him in the dressing room, still in his kit
, sat with his head in his hands.
He refuses to look at them.
"I've let you down, I've let you down"
"Don't be daft, you got a draw against France, all by yourself
And they only scored at the very very end!"
"No, No, I have, I've let you down.
I got sent off after 12 minutes!!!!!!"
via
an important European Championship qualifier game.
David Beckham goes into the English changing room to find all his team mates looking a bit glum.
"What's up?" he asks.
"Well, we're having trouble getting motivated for this game.
We know it's important but it's only France.
They're sh*t and we can't be bothered"
Beckham looks at them and says
"Well, I reckon I can beat these guys by myself,
you lads go down the pub."
So David Beckham goes out to play France by himself
and the rest of the England team go off for a few jars.
After a few pints they wonder how the game is going,
so they get the landlord to put the teletext on.
A big cheer goes up as the screen reads
"England 1 - France 0 (D. Beckham 10 minutes)"
He is beating France all by himself!
Anyway, a few more pints later
and the game is forgotten until someone remembers
"It must be full time now, let's see how he got on."
They put the teletext on.
"Result from the Millennium Stadium :
England 1 (Beckham 10 minutes) - France 1 (Zidane 89 minutes).
They can't believe it, he has single handedly got a draw against France!!
They rush back to the Stadium to congratulate him.
They find him in the dressing room, still in his kit
, sat with his head in his hands.
He refuses to look at them.
"I've let you down, I've let you down"
"Don't be daft, you got a draw against France, all by yourself
And they only scored at the very very end!"
"No, No, I have, I've let you down.
I got sent off after 12 minutes!!!!!!"
via
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Vuvuzela Time
Most people find the vuvuzela annoying. However, there are people who actually like the sound of this instrument. If you're one of them, you can now browse the web as if you're at the 2010 World Cup.
Click here to browse Dailysnack in World Cup 2010 mode.
Or click here to browse your choice of website in WC2010 mode.
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How Secure Is Your Password?
Choosing the right password is something that many people find difficult. There are so many things that require passwords these days that remembering them all can be a real problem. Perhaps because of this a lot of people choose their passwords very badly.
To know whether your password is secure, type it in and find out how long it would take for someone with a desktop PC to crack your password. The site claims no data is stored or transferred anywhere but if you're not sure, don't give away your password.
Test it here.
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Monday, June 21, 2010
Attitude
There once was a woman who woke up one morning, looked in the mirror and noticed she had only three hairs on her head.
Well,” she said, “I think I’ll braid my hair today?” So she did and she had a wonderful day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and saw that she had only two hairs on her head.
“H-M-M,” she said, “I think I’ll part my hair down the middle today.”
So she did and she had a grand day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that she had only one hair on her head.
“Well,” she said, “today I’m going to wear my hair in a pony tail.”
So she did and she had a fun, fun day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that there wasn’t a single hair on her head.
“YEA!” she exclaimed, “I don’t have to fix my hair today!”
via
Well,” she said, “I think I’ll braid my hair today?” So she did and she had a wonderful day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and saw that she had only two hairs on her head.
“H-M-M,” she said, “I think I’ll part my hair down the middle today.”
So she did and she had a grand day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that she had only one hair on her head.
“Well,” she said, “today I’m going to wear my hair in a pony tail.”
So she did and she had a fun, fun day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that there wasn’t a single hair on her head.
“YEA!” she exclaimed, “I don’t have to fix my hair today!”
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Sunday, June 20, 2010
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
51 Pasta Shapes
When making delicious pasta dishes, be sure to choose a pasta shape and sauce that complement each other. Thin, delicate pastas like angel hair or thin spaghetti, should be served with light, thin sauces. Thicker pasta shapes, like fettuccine, work well with heavier sauces. Pasta shapes with holes or ridges like mostaccioli or radiatore, are perfect for chunkier sauces.
View the rest here.
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Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Monday, June 14, 2010
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Thursday, June 10, 2010
The Psychic
Jennifer visited a psychic of some local repute.
In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the mystic delivered grave news:
"There's no easy way to say this, so I'll just be blunt - prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die a violent and horrible death this year."
Visibly shaken, Jennifer stared at the woman's lined face, then at the single flickering candle, then down at her hands. She took a few deep breaths to compose herself.
She simply had to know. She met the fortune teller's gaze, steadied her voice, and asked:
"Will I be acquitted?"
via
In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the mystic delivered grave news:
"There's no easy way to say this, so I'll just be blunt - prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die a violent and horrible death this year."
Visibly shaken, Jennifer stared at the woman's lined face, then at the single flickering candle, then down at her hands. She took a few deep breaths to compose herself.
She simply had to know. She met the fortune teller's gaze, steadied her voice, and asked:
"Will I be acquitted?"
via
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Monday, June 7, 2010
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Sydney Sharks
Description
After visiting family in Tampa Bay and it's thirst for destroying aircraft and killing of innocents unquenched, our friend and savior the Shark journeyed across half the planet to find itself in the land down under, Australia. With annihilation of various marsupial species in mind, it will brutally murder everything that gets in it's way and everything not in it's way, taking down a helicopter or two as chaser. Somewhere in the distance a koala has a premonition of it's untimely and overly violent death.
Controls
Caution! This game works best with Firefox or Chrome.
Bite = A or CTRL
Move = ARROWKEYS
Dive deep and then come back up for a SUPERJUMP!
Jump on boats and things to break them!
Try to bite aircrafts and pull them down into the water!
Play this funny game here.
Friday, June 4, 2010
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Train Trip
A large two engined train was crossing America. After they had gone some distance one of the engines broke down. "No problem," the engineer thought, and carried on at half power.
Farther on down the line, the other engine broke down, and the train came to a standstill.
The engineer decided he should inform the passengers about why the train had stopped, and made the following announcement:
"Ladies and gentlemen, I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that both engines have failed, and we will be stuck here for some time. The good news is that you decided to take the train and not fly."
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Farther on down the line, the other engine broke down, and the train came to a standstill.
The engineer decided he should inform the passengers about why the train had stopped, and made the following announcement:
"Ladies and gentlemen, I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that both engines have failed, and we will be stuck here for some time. The good news is that you decided to take the train and not fly."
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