Three women go down to Mexico one night to celebrate college graduation. They get drunk, and wake up in jail, only to find that they are to be executed in the morning, though none of them can remember what they did the night before.
The first one, a redhead, is strapped in the electric chair and is asked if she has any last words. She says, "I just graduated from Brigham Young University and believe in
the almighty power of God to intervene on behalf of the innocent ."
They throw the switch and nothing happens. They all immediately fall on their knees, beg for forgiveness, and
release her.
The second one, a brunette, is strapped in and gives her last words. "I just graduated from the Harvard School of Law and I believe in the power of justice to intervene on the part of the innocent."
They throw the switch And again, nothing happens. Again they all immediately fall to their knees, beg for forgiveness and release her.
The last one (you know it), a blonde, is strapped in and says, "Well, I'm from The University of Texas and just graduated with a degree in Electrical Engineering, and I'll tell ya right now, ya'll ain't gonna electrocute nobody if you don't plug this thing in.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Ed's Problem
"Don't laugh!" said the patient, Ed.
"Of course I won't laugh," the doctor said. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient."
"Okay then," Ed said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest penis the doctor had ever seen. It couldn't have been bigger than the size of a AAA battery.
Unable to control himself, the doctor started giggling, then fell laughing to the floor. Ten minutes later he was able to struggle to his feet and regain his composure.
"I'm so sorry," said the doctor. "I really am. I don't know what came over me. On my honor as a doctor and a gentleman, I promise it won't happen again. Now...what seems
to be the problem?"
"It's swollen," Ed replied.
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"Of course I won't laugh," the doctor said. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient."
"Okay then," Ed said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest penis the doctor had ever seen. It couldn't have been bigger than the size of a AAA battery.
Unable to control himself, the doctor started giggling, then fell laughing to the floor. Ten minutes later he was able to struggle to his feet and regain his composure.
"I'm so sorry," said the doctor. "I really am. I don't know what came over me. On my honor as a doctor and a gentleman, I promise it won't happen again. Now...what seems
to be the problem?"
"It's swollen," Ed replied.
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Antipodal Point on Earth
In geography, the antipodes of any place on Earth is its antipodal point; that is, the region on the Earth's surface which is diametrically opposite to it. Two points which are antipodal to one another are connected by a straight line through the centre of the Earth.
As you can see from the map. The antipodes point of Singapore falls on South America, Country Ecuador, Province Pastaza. More on Pastaza, Ecuador here.
Find your antipodal point here.
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As you can see from the map. The antipodes point of Singapore falls on South America, Country Ecuador, Province Pastaza. More on Pastaza, Ecuador here.
Find your antipodal point here.
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ID Ten T error
I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Jaden, the 9 year Old next door whose bedroom looks like Mission Control, and asked him to Come over.
Jaden clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.
As he was walking away, I called after him, ‘So, what was wrong?
He replied, ‘It was an ID ten T error.’
I didn’t want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, ‘An, ID Ten T error? What’s that? In case I need to fix it again.’
Jaden grinned. ‘Haven’t you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?”
No,’ I replied.
‘Write it down,’ he said, ‘and I think you’ll figure it Out.’
So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T
I used to like the little shit.
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Jaden clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.
As he was walking away, I called after him, ‘So, what was wrong?
He replied, ‘It was an ID ten T error.’
I didn’t want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, ‘An, ID Ten T error? What’s that? In case I need to fix it again.’
Jaden grinned. ‘Haven’t you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?”
No,’ I replied.
‘Write it down,’ he said, ‘and I think you’ll figure it Out.’
So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T
I used to like the little shit.
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Fantastic Natural Phenomena
The classical natural wonders are huge and hard to miss - vast canyons, giant mountains and the like. Many of the most fantastic natural phenomena, however, are also least easy to spot. Some are incredibly rare while others are located in hard-to-reach parts of the planet. From moving rocks to mammatus clouds and red tides to fire rainbows, here are seven of the most spectacular phenomenal wonders of the natural world.
1) Sailing Stones
The mysterious moving stones of the packed-mud desert of Death Valley have been a center of scientific controversy for decades. Rocks weighing up to hundreds of pounds have been known to move up to hundreds of yards at a time. Some scientists have proposed that a combination of strong winds and surface ice account for these movements. However, this theory does not explain evidence of different rocks starting side by side and moving at different rates and in disparate directions. Moreover, the physics calculations do not fully support this theory as wind speeds of hundreds of miles per hour would be needed to move some of the stones.
2) Columnar Basalt
When a thick lava flow cools it contracts vertically but cracks perpendicular to its directional flow with remarkable geometric regularity - in most cases forming a regular grid of remarkable hexagonal extrusions that almost appear to be made by man. One of the most famous such examples is the Giant's Causeway on the coast of Ireland (shown above) though the largest and most widely recognized would be Devil's Tower in Wyoming . Basalt also forms different but equally fascinating ways when eruptions are exposed to air or water.
3) Blue Holes
Blue holes are giant and sudden drops in underwater elevation that get their name from the dark and foreboding blue tone they exhibit when viewed from above in relationship to surrounding waters. They can be hundreds of feet deep and while divers are able to explore some of them they are largely devoid of oxygen that would support sea life due to poor water circulation - leaving them eerily empty. Some blue holes, however, contain ancient fossil remains that have been discovered, preserved in their depths.
4) Red Tides
Red tides are also known as algal blooms - sudden influxes of massive amounts of colored single-cell algae that can convert entire areas of an ocean or beach into a blood red color. While some of these can be relatively harmless, others can be harbingers of deadly toxins that cause the deaths of fish, birds and marine mammals. In some cases, even humans have been harmed by red tides though no human exposure are known to have been fatal. While they can be fatal, the constituent phytoplankton in ride tides are not harmful in small numbers.
5) Ice Circles
While many see these apparently perfect ice circles as worthy of conspiracy theorizing, scientists generally accept that they are formed by eddies in the water that spin a sizable piece of ice in a circular motion. As a result of this rotation, other pieces of ice and flotsam wear relatively evenly at the edges of the ice until it slowly forms into an essentially ideal circle. Ice circles have been seen with diameters of over 500 feet and can also at times be found in clusters and groups at different sizes as shown above.
6)Fire Rainbows
1) Sailing Stones
The mysterious moving stones of the packed-mud desert of Death Valley have been a center of scientific controversy for decades. Rocks weighing up to hundreds of pounds have been known to move up to hundreds of yards at a time. Some scientists have proposed that a combination of strong winds and surface ice account for these movements. However, this theory does not explain evidence of different rocks starting side by side and moving at different rates and in disparate directions. Moreover, the physics calculations do not fully support this theory as wind speeds of hundreds of miles per hour would be needed to move some of the stones.
2) Columnar Basalt
When a thick lava flow cools it contracts vertically but cracks perpendicular to its directional flow with remarkable geometric regularity - in most cases forming a regular grid of remarkable hexagonal extrusions that almost appear to be made by man. One of the most famous such examples is the Giant's Causeway on the coast of Ireland (shown above) though the largest and most widely recognized would be Devil's Tower in Wyoming . Basalt also forms different but equally fascinating ways when eruptions are exposed to air or water.
3) Blue Holes
Blue holes are giant and sudden drops in underwater elevation that get their name from the dark and foreboding blue tone they exhibit when viewed from above in relationship to surrounding waters. They can be hundreds of feet deep and while divers are able to explore some of them they are largely devoid of oxygen that would support sea life due to poor water circulation - leaving them eerily empty. Some blue holes, however, contain ancient fossil remains that have been discovered, preserved in their depths.
4) Red Tides
Red tides are also known as algal blooms - sudden influxes of massive amounts of colored single-cell algae that can convert entire areas of an ocean or beach into a blood red color. While some of these can be relatively harmless, others can be harbingers of deadly toxins that cause the deaths of fish, birds and marine mammals. In some cases, even humans have been harmed by red tides though no human exposure are known to have been fatal. While they can be fatal, the constituent phytoplankton in ride tides are not harmful in small numbers.
5) Ice Circles
While many see these apparently perfect ice circles as worthy of conspiracy theorizing, scientists generally accept that they are formed by eddies in the water that spin a sizable piece of ice in a circular motion. As a result of this rotation, other pieces of ice and flotsam wear relatively evenly at the edges of the ice until it slowly forms into an essentially ideal circle. Ice circles have been seen with diameters of over 500 feet and can also at times be found in clusters and groups at different sizes as shown above.
6)Fire Rainbows
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Object Graveyard
The world is rife with ‘stuff’, and the simple fact is we’re producing new vehicles, gadgets and gizmos faster than we can get rid of the old ones. Tires, airplanes, bicycles and cell phones don’t just magically disappear once they outlive their usefulness. Sometimes they’re gathered together, stripped down and recycled, and sometimes they’re just left to sit and rot for decades on end. Here’s a look at the afterlife of everyday objects, piled into staggering mounds that resemble nothing more than cemeteries for stuff.
Read more here
Batman X-Ray T-Shirt
“This Batman shirt shows what the Bat-symbol would look like if it were behind an X-Ray machine. The skeleton of the bat glows in the dark!”
Buy it here
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Monday, March 23, 2009
Potato Patch
An aging man lived alone in Ireland. His only son was in Long Kesh Prison, and he didn't know anyone who would spade up his potato garden. The old man wrote to his son about it.
The son soon mailed his reply, "For HEAVENS SAKE, Pa, don't dig up that garden, that's where I buried the guns!"
At 4 A.M. the next morning, a dozen British soldiers showed up and dug up the entire garden, but didn't find any guns. Confused, the man wrote to his son telling him what happened and asking him what to do next.
His son's reply was: "Just plant your potatoes, Dad, it was the best I could do from here."
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The son soon mailed his reply, "For HEAVENS SAKE, Pa, don't dig up that garden, that's where I buried the guns!"
At 4 A.M. the next morning, a dozen British soldiers showed up and dug up the entire garden, but didn't find any guns. Confused, the man wrote to his son telling him what happened and asking him what to do next.
His son's reply was: "Just plant your potatoes, Dad, it was the best I could do from here."
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Order In Court
A man is in court for murder and the judge says, ''You are charged with beating your wife to death with a hammer.''
Then a voice at the back of the court says, ''You bastard.''
The judge continues, ''You are also charged with beating your daughter to death with a hammer.''
Again the voice at the back of the court says, ''You bastard.''
The judge says, ''Now, we cannot have any more of these outbursts from you or I shall charge you with contempt! What is the problem?''
The man at the back of the court says, ''Fifteen years I lived next door to that bastard and everytime I asked to borrow a hammer he said he never had one!''
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Then a voice at the back of the court says, ''You bastard.''
The judge continues, ''You are also charged with beating your daughter to death with a hammer.''
Again the voice at the back of the court says, ''You bastard.''
The judge says, ''Now, we cannot have any more of these outbursts from you or I shall charge you with contempt! What is the problem?''
The man at the back of the court says, ''Fifteen years I lived next door to that bastard and everytime I asked to borrow a hammer he said he never had one!''
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Castle Optical Illusion
Instructions: There’s a black dot in the center. Stare at the dot till the countdown ends, and the black and white picture should look like it’s in color…until you move your eyes!
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Tweety is Old
Born in 1942, Tweety Bird is showing his 67 years of struggle trying to keep away from that putty tat Sylvester. The balding bird is mostly retired, but every now and them he puts on a wig and gets a shot of Geritol and makes an appearance.
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Sunday, March 22, 2009
Bloons Tower Defense
Stop any bloons from escaping the maze by building and upgrading bloons popping towers. Towers can throw darts, tacks, bombs, and ice. Can you make it through all 50 levels?
Click Here to play
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
The cowboy and the government genie
A modern day cowboy has spent many days crossing the Texas plains without water…
His horse has already died of thirst.
He’s crawling through the sand, certain that he has breathed his last breath, when all of a sudden he sees an object sticking out of the sand several yards ahead of him.
He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the sand, and discovers what looks to be an old briefcase.
He opens it and out pops a genie. But this is no ordinary genie. She is wearing a FEMA (Federal Emergency Management Agency) ID badge and a dull gray dress.
There’s a calculator in her pocketbook. She has a pencil tucked behind one ear. ‘Well, cowboy,’ says the genie.. ‘You know how I work….You have three wishes.’
‘I’m not falling for this,’ said the cowboy… ‘I’m not going trust a FEMA genie…..’
‘What do you have to lose? You’ve go t n o transportation, and it looks like you’re a goner anyway!’
The cowboy thinks about this for a minute, and decides that the genie is right.
‘OK!, I wish I were in a lush oasis with plenty of food and drink.’
***POOF*** The cowboy finds himself in the most beautiful oasis he has ever seen, and he is surrounded with j ugs of wine and platters of delicacies.
‘OK, cowpoke, what’s your second wish?’
‘My second wish is that I was rich beyond my wildest dreams.’
***POOF*** The cowboy finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare gold coins and precious gems.
‘OK, cowpuncher, you have j ust one more wish. Better make it a good one!’
After thinking for a few minutes, the cowboy says… ‘I wish that no matter where I go, beautiful women will want and need me.’
***POOF*** He was turned into a tampon.
The moral of the story: If the government offers to help you, there’s going to be a string attached.
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His horse has already died of thirst.
He’s crawling through the sand, certain that he has breathed his last breath, when all of a sudden he sees an object sticking out of the sand several yards ahead of him.
He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the sand, and discovers what looks to be an old briefcase.
He opens it and out pops a genie. But this is no ordinary genie. She is wearing a FEMA (Federal Emergency Management Agency) ID badge and a dull gray dress.
There’s a calculator in her pocketbook. She has a pencil tucked behind one ear. ‘Well, cowboy,’ says the genie.. ‘You know how I work….You have three wishes.’
‘I’m not falling for this,’ said the cowboy… ‘I’m not going trust a FEMA genie…..’
‘What do you have to lose? You’ve go t n o transportation, and it looks like you’re a goner anyway!’
The cowboy thinks about this for a minute, and decides that the genie is right.
‘OK!, I wish I were in a lush oasis with plenty of food and drink.’
***POOF*** The cowboy finds himself in the most beautiful oasis he has ever seen, and he is surrounded with j ugs of wine and platters of delicacies.
‘OK, cowpoke, what’s your second wish?’
‘My second wish is that I was rich beyond my wildest dreams.’
***POOF*** The cowboy finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare gold coins and precious gems.
‘OK, cowpuncher, you have j ust one more wish. Better make it a good one!’
After thinking for a few minutes, the cowboy says… ‘I wish that no matter where I go, beautiful women will want and need me.’
***POOF*** He was turned into a tampon.
The moral of the story: If the government offers to help you, there’s going to be a string attached.
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Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Amazing Human Facts
1. People with higher number of moles tend to live longer than people with lesser number of moles.
3. When filming summer scenes in winter, actors suck on ice cubes just before the camera rolls - it cools their mouths so their breath doesn’t condense in the cold air.
4. Thinking about your muscles can make you stronger.
5. Grapefruit scent will make middle aged women appear six years younger to men. The perception is not reciprocal and the grapefruit scent on men has no effect on women’s perception.
6. The world’s youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.
7. The colder the room you sleep in, the better the chances are that you’ll have a bad dream.
8. There are more people alive today than have ever died.
9. Women’s hair is about half the diameter of men’s hair
10. Women blink twice as many times as men do.
11. The average person who stops smoking requires one hour less sleep a night.
12. Laughing lowers levels of stress hormones and strengthens the immune system. Six-year-olds laugh an average of 300 times a day. Adults only laugh 15 to 100 times a day.
13. Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
14. The human heart creates enough pressure while pumping to squirt blood 30 feet!
15. The brain operates on the same amount of power as 10-watt light bulb. The cartoon image of a light bulb over your head when a great thought occurs isn’t too far off the mark. Your brain generates as much energy as a small light bulb even when you’re sleeping.
16. The brain is much more active at night than during the day.
17. The brain itself cannot feel pain. While the brain might be the pain center when you cut your finger or burn yourself, the brain itself does not have pain receptors and cannot feel pain.
18. The fastest growing nail is on the middle finger. And the nail on the middle finger of your dominant hand will grow the fastest of all. Why is not entirely known, but nail growth is related to the length of the finger, with the longest fingers growing nails the fastest and shortest the slowest.
19. The lifespan of a human hair is 3 to 7 years on average.
20. Human hair is virtually indestructible. Aside from it’s flammability, human hair decays at such a slow rate that it is practically non-disintegrative. Hair cannot be destroyed by cold, change of climate, water, or other natural forces and it is resistant to many kinds of acids and corrosive chemicals.
21. The acid in your stomach is strong enough to dissolve razorblades. Hydrochloric acid, the type found in your stomach, is not only good at dissolving the pizza you had for dinner but can also eat through many types of metal.
22. The surface area of a human lung is equal to a tennis court.
23. Sneezes regularly exceed 100 mph.
24. Approximately 75% of human waste is made of water.
25. The average person expels flatulence 14 times each day. Even if you’d like to think you’re too dignified to pass gas, the reality is that almost everyone will at least a few times a day.
26. Earwax production is necessary for good ear health. While many people find earwax to be disgusting, it’s actually a very important part of your ear’s defense system. It protects the delicate inner ear from bacteria, fungus, dirt and even insects. It also cleans and lubricates the ear canal.
27. Babies are always born with blue eyes. The melanin in a newborn’s eyes often needs time after birth to be fully deposited or to be darkened by exposure to ultraviolet light, later revealing the baby’s true eye color.
28. Every human spent about half an hour as a single cell.
29. After eating too much, your hearing is less sharp.
30. Women are born better smellers than men and remain better smellers over life.
More here
3. When filming summer scenes in winter, actors suck on ice cubes just before the camera rolls - it cools their mouths so their breath doesn’t condense in the cold air.
4. Thinking about your muscles can make you stronger.
5. Grapefruit scent will make middle aged women appear six years younger to men. The perception is not reciprocal and the grapefruit scent on men has no effect on women’s perception.
6. The world’s youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.
7. The colder the room you sleep in, the better the chances are that you’ll have a bad dream.
8. There are more people alive today than have ever died.
9. Women’s hair is about half the diameter of men’s hair
10. Women blink twice as many times as men do.
11. The average person who stops smoking requires one hour less sleep a night.
12. Laughing lowers levels of stress hormones and strengthens the immune system. Six-year-olds laugh an average of 300 times a day. Adults only laugh 15 to 100 times a day.
13. Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
14. The human heart creates enough pressure while pumping to squirt blood 30 feet!
15. The brain operates on the same amount of power as 10-watt light bulb. The cartoon image of a light bulb over your head when a great thought occurs isn’t too far off the mark. Your brain generates as much energy as a small light bulb even when you’re sleeping.
16. The brain is much more active at night than during the day.
17. The brain itself cannot feel pain. While the brain might be the pain center when you cut your finger or burn yourself, the brain itself does not have pain receptors and cannot feel pain.
18. The fastest growing nail is on the middle finger. And the nail on the middle finger of your dominant hand will grow the fastest of all. Why is not entirely known, but nail growth is related to the length of the finger, with the longest fingers growing nails the fastest and shortest the slowest.
19. The lifespan of a human hair is 3 to 7 years on average.
20. Human hair is virtually indestructible. Aside from it’s flammability, human hair decays at such a slow rate that it is practically non-disintegrative. Hair cannot be destroyed by cold, change of climate, water, or other natural forces and it is resistant to many kinds of acids and corrosive chemicals.
21. The acid in your stomach is strong enough to dissolve razorblades. Hydrochloric acid, the type found in your stomach, is not only good at dissolving the pizza you had for dinner but can also eat through many types of metal.
22. The surface area of a human lung is equal to a tennis court.
23. Sneezes regularly exceed 100 mph.
24. Approximately 75% of human waste is made of water.
25. The average person expels flatulence 14 times each day. Even if you’d like to think you’re too dignified to pass gas, the reality is that almost everyone will at least a few times a day.
26. Earwax production is necessary for good ear health. While many people find earwax to be disgusting, it’s actually a very important part of your ear’s defense system. It protects the delicate inner ear from bacteria, fungus, dirt and even insects. It also cleans and lubricates the ear canal.
27. Babies are always born with blue eyes. The melanin in a newborn’s eyes often needs time after birth to be fully deposited or to be darkened by exposure to ultraviolet light, later revealing the baby’s true eye color.
28. Every human spent about half an hour as a single cell.
29. After eating too much, your hearing is less sharp.
30. Women are born better smellers than men and remain better smellers over life.
More here
Monday, March 16, 2009
Primary School Proverbs
A Primary School teacher had twenty-six children in her class. She presented each child in her classroom the 1st half of a well-known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe these were actually done by Primary School children. Their insight may surprise you. While reading, keep in mind that these are 6-year-olds, because the last one is a classic!
26. Better be late than....... Pregnant
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26. Better be late than....... Pregnant
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Saturday, March 14, 2009
Friday The 13th Facts
Here are five of our favorite Friday-the-13th facts:
1. Fear of Friday the 13th — one of the most popular myths in science — is called paraskavedekatriaphobia as well as friggatriskaidekaphobia. Triskaidekaphobia is fear of the number 13.
2. Many hospitals have no room 13, while some tall buildings skip the 13th floor and some airline terminals omit Gate 13.
3. President Franklin D. Roosevelt would not travel on the 13th day of any month and would never host 13 guests at a meal. Napoleon and President Herbert Hoover were also triskaidekaphobic, with an abnormal fear of the number 13.
4. Mark Twain once was the 13th guest at a dinner party. A friend warned him not to go. "It was bad luck," Twain later told the friend. "They only had food for 12." Superstitious diners in Paris can hire a quatorzieme, or professional 14th guest.
5. The number 13 suffers from its position after 12, according to numerologists who consider the latter to be a complete number — 12 months in a year, 12 signs of the zodiac, 12 gods of Olympus, 12 labors of Hercules, 12 tribes of Israel, 12 apostles of Jesus, 12 days of Christmas and 12 eggs in a dozen.
Livescience
1. Fear of Friday the 13th — one of the most popular myths in science — is called paraskavedekatriaphobia as well as friggatriskaidekaphobia. Triskaidekaphobia is fear of the number 13.
2. Many hospitals have no room 13, while some tall buildings skip the 13th floor and some airline terminals omit Gate 13.
3. President Franklin D. Roosevelt would not travel on the 13th day of any month and would never host 13 guests at a meal. Napoleon and President Herbert Hoover were also triskaidekaphobic, with an abnormal fear of the number 13.
4. Mark Twain once was the 13th guest at a dinner party. A friend warned him not to go. "It was bad luck," Twain later told the friend. "They only had food for 12." Superstitious diners in Paris can hire a quatorzieme, or professional 14th guest.
5. The number 13 suffers from its position after 12, according to numerologists who consider the latter to be a complete number — 12 months in a year, 12 signs of the zodiac, 12 gods of Olympus, 12 labors of Hercules, 12 tribes of Israel, 12 apostles of Jesus, 12 days of Christmas and 12 eggs in a dozen.
Livescience
Words Women Uses
(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with “nothing” usually end in “fine.”
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!
(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a not word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing)
(6) That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question or faint. Just say you’re welcome. (I want to add a clause here - This is true, unless she says ‘Thanks a lot’ - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say “you’re welcome.” That will bring on a “whatever”
(8) Whatever: Is a woman’s way of saying you are in big trouble.
(9) Don’t worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to #3
* Send this to the men you know, to warn them about arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology
*Send this to all the women you know to give them a good laugh, because they know it’s true
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(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with “nothing” usually end in “fine.”
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!
(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a not word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing)
(6) That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question or faint. Just say you’re welcome. (I want to add a clause here - This is true, unless she says ‘Thanks a lot’ - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say “you’re welcome.” That will bring on a “whatever”
(8) Whatever: Is a woman’s way of saying you are in big trouble.
(9) Don’t worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to #3
* Send this to the men you know, to warn them about arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology
*Send this to all the women you know to give them a good laugh, because they know it’s true
via
Singapore Ikea Sales - Less Is More!
An advert for an Ikea Sale in Singapore, spoofing a couple who got arrested walking naked down Holland Village one night.
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Thursday, March 12, 2009
Building Paintings
Very nice paintings on buildings. If only the paint work of Singapore's building are as creative and interesting.
More here.
A Trillion Dollars
Optical Illusion
Look at the black spot for about 30 seconds and then the two rectangles will disappear.
Its Coming!!! - Sandstorm in Saudi
A massive and powerful sandstorm hit the capital of Saudi Arabia Riyadh on March 10.
It’s very impressive.
More pictures here.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Spiders Infested Forest
This was taken at a State Park on Lake Tawakoni in Northeast Texas.Samples contained 250 specimens in 12 families. The samples contained at least 16 identified genera.
The spiders sampled included 151 Tetragnathidae, 46 Salticidae, and 19 Araneidae. These three families represented 60.0 %, 18.4 %, and 7.6 % of the spiders in the samples respectively. These three spider families accounted for 86 % of the spiders collected.Samples contained 250 specimens in 12 families. Sheets of web have encased several mature oak trees and are thick enough in places to block out the sun along a nature trail at Lake Tawakoni State Park, near this town about 50 miles east of Dallas.
The gossamer strands, slowly overtaking a lakefront peninsula, emit a fetid odor, perhaps from the dead insects entwined in the silk. The web whines with the sound of countless mosquitoes and flies trapped in its folds.
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Monday, March 9, 2009
Navy Pilot
I overheard a U.S. Navy pilot trying to impress a blonde in a bar.
PILOT: Did you know the most difficult job in the US Military is being a Navy Pilot?
BLONDE: I guess it is really hard to make the boats fly!
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PILOT: Did you know the most difficult job in the US Military is being a Navy Pilot?
BLONDE: I guess it is really hard to make the boats fly!
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Sunday, March 8, 2009
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Solar System Simplified
For those who have problems remembering the 9 planets, here's a sentence that might help
My Very Excellent Mother Just Served Us Nine Pizzas.
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